GH 2/26: Pesky Plate Tectonics
XTREME Motors: Remember when Johnny was a pauper, and he found an abandoned, yet perfectly apportioned garage out in the mountains. And it was further established as being in the middle of nowhere when Maxie and Johnny were stranded there one night with nothing but a 6 pack and their mutual attraction? Apparently the Zaccaras only invest in properties located on active fault lines. Just like their house moved from about an hour and a half away in the Hudson River Valley....to down the street from Sonny, so now has Johnny's garage moved from the mountains the the downtown, traffic foley section of Port Charles. Lucky breaks in, looking for clues and finds his father has already broken in.
Nurse's Station: Patrick and Robin bicker loudly about how even though they save people's lives for a living and know the harm a bullet can do, she still thinks Jason and Sonny are neato b/c of how polite they are to people they aren't trying to murder. Lisa, who normally bugs the ever loving crap out of me, butts in, probably mostly b/c she wants Patrick but also because, as she points out "why are you so involved with these mobsters?" Ha! Robin says Lisa doesn't know the history. Lisa shrugs and asks "what's to know? People who shoot unarmed cops are not nice people. They are criminals, and they deserve to be prosecuted." Robin does that thing everyone does in Port Charles when faced with commercials....she looks down and to the left and waits for the director to yell "cut!" so they can quickly go to another scene and never have an honest conversation about their ambivalence. No one ever concedes that Sonny and Jason are criminals. They just cling to that whole "but the pasta is so tasty!" "He cheered me up when my lover died!" or most importantly "because they are so bereft of morals, they never, never never judge the obnoxious things I do!"
Courtroom: Country judge and the attorneys and Sonny all have remarkably unrealistic interactions regarding Sonny's bail.
Credits
Jason's Penthouse: Jason and Sam stand around like they are playing "Mannequins" a game my brother and I played when we were like 4 and 7. We'd sit in the car and stay perfectly still in mannequin poses, so that people would think my mom was carting around mannequins. I know to you that does not sound fun, but it would crack us up at how preposterous it was. The game was really not to giggle at how silly the other one looked, pretending to be a mannequin. Anyway, Jason and Sam are playing that, or so it appears, while Spinelli am opewquwnfeaw 's the escape route for Sonny.
Courthouse: No idea what the attorneys are saying. For some reason Alexis is sonny's attorney now too? Clair questions Dante. Alexis keeps objecting. Sustained! Sustained! I sustain all objections to this storyline!
Haunted Star: Tracy delights in flirting a bit with Johnny and Ethan, while also clawing at them with her eyes, trying to get the dirt on whatever they are doing, so that she can protect her family. I want to donate to a charity where if I donate the most, I get to go shopping at Mood with Jane Elliot, and then Tim Gunn guides the Project Runway people to "design a modern look for a total fucking badass who might be part vampire" or however he'd describe Tracy Quartermaine. If anyone hears of a silent auction like that, email me at madcaprecaps@gmail.com!!!!
Xtreme Motors: Lucky recounts to Luke about how he drove recklessly and hit Maxie, and it was so ironic.
Nurse's Station: So, sort of awesomely, this has turned into an intervention for Robin, with Lisa, Stephen and Patrick doing their best to deprogram their friend. She insists that Sonny has done wonderful things for her, Patrick quietly says that doesn't mean she owes him for the rest of her life. Robin points out that Sonny did create the AIDS wing, which reasonably implies that she sort of does owe him her life, since, as we know, she magically basically doesn't have HIV....and it's also true there are plenty of people who are HIV positive but b/c they got the right drug cocktail at the right time, they are basically living perfectly healthy, normal lives. Stephen weirdly talks to the back of Robin's head that Sonny has been very generous to the hospital, but it's their ethical duty not to let that affect how they treat any patients. Robin sullenly admits defeat, in a pouty way and storms off. It's that way people say "My question is were you always such a jackass?" in Survivor final tribal council.
Commercials
Xtreme Motors: Lucky blathers about how it was so hard for him to lie to Liz that he forgave her "she's disappearing before my eyes." That's because you have to make sure Steve and Audrey kiss at the Under the Sea Dance back in Victorian Port Charles, Lucky! Otherwise, Liz will never be born! Lucky doesn't know what to do. Luke suggests they take off for Florida. Lucky gets teary eyed, and at first, I think it's b/c he's sad that his father's first impulse is to bail when things get tough, and that he doesn't want to do that to his children. But then it turns out he doesn't think they should leave Ethan, a grown ass man, stuck in some stupid conflict between Sonny and Johnny....totally of his own accord. Luke says they can kidnap Ethan, and Lucky thinks it sounds like a good idea. (meanwhile, across town, Cameron wakes up screaming.) Luke says they have to address Lucky's anger.
Haunted Star: Tracy continues to beg Ethan to stay away from Johnny.
Jason's Penthouse: Sam, Jason and Spinelli stand around plotting a jail break. But they are SO NICE ABOUT IT, y'all!
Courthouse: After much back and forth between Clair, The Atorrneys Corinthos, and Country Judge, Clair reminds Dante he is under oath and asks who shot him.
Commercials
Courthouse: Dante answers the question by giving a year of background about going to Sonny's, knowing he'd been made. he lies that he took a gun out of Sonny's desk, and it jammed when he loaded it. And then Clair says, "But Detective Falconari, here is the forensic evidence that will be corroborated by 10 other scientists, and it is a physical impossibility that what you say is true. Also, where is this gun, then, if you shot yourself?" Or not really. Really, no one says any of that, and Jax shakes his head sadly.
Kelly's: Robin meets with Stephen. She says Sonny and Jason do awful things, but they also do wonderful things. Robin, no one has ever said anything other than that. But how are Lisa, Patrick and Stephen wrong that it ain't none of yours? She yammers about how she's seen Sonny at his most loving and protective side. Does she understand that if Michael had died when Patrick operated on him, he might have murdered her husband? Or how about how Dante is loving and generous and kind and has saved people's lives left and right, and Sonny was still willing to throw that all away?
Jake's: Patrick angrily throws darts. Lisa shows up to get drunk and let him complain about his wife with her. How about this, Robin? How about this conversation that you are letting happen right now? Is defending Jason and Sonny really more important than your own marriage? Has Patrick not been loving and kind? He has seen you at your actual worst, no? YOU THREW HIS BABY IN A FUCKING TREE, ROBIN, and Patrick not only forgave you, he nurtured you to health. What is the worst thing Sonny's seen you do? Tattle that Sonny and Jason kidnapped AJ"s son? Yet you're such an idiot you don't realize that it was YOU who could forgive THEM for doing that, not vice versa, like they poutingly demanded. It's wrong of Patrick to cheat, if that's what he does. But it's also wrong to choose the side of other men over your husband, over and over again, when that's based on some romanticized view of the past and a serious disrespect of the present. Sorry, just totally mad at Robin today. Lisa speaks in dulcet tones while Patrick drinks his beer, feeling like he comes second place to a hit man....who would kill him if it came to that, by the way. Again, it's wrong if he cheats, but it's even more wrong if he stays in a marriage with someone who feels that way about him. Also, go visit Liz! She's disappearing unless you can get Steve and Audrey to kiss!
Commercials
Jake's: Patrick mutters stuff about Robin, about how she'd keep something from him.. I missed what, but Lisa astutely says that must make him feel shut out. My guess is roughly 75% of marital affairs start out just like this.
Kelly's: Stephen says Patrick doesn't understand her loyalty to Sonny, and he thinks Patrick has a point. Robin repeats that same stupid point that patrick wasn't there and how nice he was to her. She doesn't want to be judged on her past. wtf? But she's ONLY judging Sonny based on his past. If she wants to just use the present: um: RIGHT NOW Sonny is on trial for murder, and he can't get bail b/c he shot a cop.
Stupid Break Out Set: Spinelli and Jason play Chloe and Jack, only without the even more improbable time travel across town.
Courthouse: In recess, Sonny goes to Dante and stands in front of him and holds out his hand. Like he's holding out a delicious ham. Like Dante is soooo lucky that Sonny is going to thank him. Dante stands and says Sonny isn't going to go to prison b/c Dante botched his arrest. "you're going to prison because you killed Claudia." Sonny nods that he knows and says thank you , son.
The judge says he's made his tedious decision.
Also, my phone rang, so I missed a few scenes.
the end
Nurse's Station: Patrick and Robin bicker loudly about how even though they save people's lives for a living and know the harm a bullet can do, she still thinks Jason and Sonny are neato b/c of how polite they are to people they aren't trying to murder. Lisa, who normally bugs the ever loving crap out of me, butts in, probably mostly b/c she wants Patrick but also because, as she points out "why are you so involved with these mobsters?" Ha! Robin says Lisa doesn't know the history. Lisa shrugs and asks "what's to know? People who shoot unarmed cops are not nice people. They are criminals, and they deserve to be prosecuted." Robin does that thing everyone does in Port Charles when faced with commercials....she looks down and to the left and waits for the director to yell "cut!" so they can quickly go to another scene and never have an honest conversation about their ambivalence. No one ever concedes that Sonny and Jason are criminals. They just cling to that whole "but the pasta is so tasty!" "He cheered me up when my lover died!" or most importantly "because they are so bereft of morals, they never, never never judge the obnoxious things I do!"
Courtroom: Country judge and the attorneys and Sonny all have remarkably unrealistic interactions regarding Sonny's bail.
Credits
Jason's Penthouse: Jason and Sam stand around like they are playing "Mannequins" a game my brother and I played when we were like 4 and 7. We'd sit in the car and stay perfectly still in mannequin poses, so that people would think my mom was carting around mannequins. I know to you that does not sound fun, but it would crack us up at how preposterous it was. The game was really not to giggle at how silly the other one looked, pretending to be a mannequin. Anyway, Jason and Sam are playing that, or so it appears, while Spinelli am opewquwnfeaw 's the escape route for Sonny.
Courthouse: No idea what the attorneys are saying. For some reason Alexis is sonny's attorney now too? Clair questions Dante. Alexis keeps objecting. Sustained! Sustained! I sustain all objections to this storyline!
Haunted Star: Tracy delights in flirting a bit with Johnny and Ethan, while also clawing at them with her eyes, trying to get the dirt on whatever they are doing, so that she can protect her family. I want to donate to a charity where if I donate the most, I get to go shopping at Mood with Jane Elliot, and then Tim Gunn guides the Project Runway people to "design a modern look for a total fucking badass who might be part vampire" or however he'd describe Tracy Quartermaine. If anyone hears of a silent auction like that, email me at madcaprecaps@gmail.com!!!!
Xtreme Motors: Lucky recounts to Luke about how he drove recklessly and hit Maxie, and it was so ironic.
Nurse's Station: So, sort of awesomely, this has turned into an intervention for Robin, with Lisa, Stephen and Patrick doing their best to deprogram their friend. She insists that Sonny has done wonderful things for her, Patrick quietly says that doesn't mean she owes him for the rest of her life. Robin points out that Sonny did create the AIDS wing, which reasonably implies that she sort of does owe him her life, since, as we know, she magically basically doesn't have HIV....and it's also true there are plenty of people who are HIV positive but b/c they got the right drug cocktail at the right time, they are basically living perfectly healthy, normal lives. Stephen weirdly talks to the back of Robin's head that Sonny has been very generous to the hospital, but it's their ethical duty not to let that affect how they treat any patients. Robin sullenly admits defeat, in a pouty way and storms off. It's that way people say "My question is were you always such a jackass?" in Survivor final tribal council.
Commercials
Xtreme Motors: Lucky blathers about how it was so hard for him to lie to Liz that he forgave her "she's disappearing before my eyes." That's because you have to make sure Steve and Audrey kiss at the Under the Sea Dance back in Victorian Port Charles, Lucky! Otherwise, Liz will never be born! Lucky doesn't know what to do. Luke suggests they take off for Florida. Lucky gets teary eyed, and at first, I think it's b/c he's sad that his father's first impulse is to bail when things get tough, and that he doesn't want to do that to his children. But then it turns out he doesn't think they should leave Ethan, a grown ass man, stuck in some stupid conflict between Sonny and Johnny....totally of his own accord. Luke says they can kidnap Ethan, and Lucky thinks it sounds like a good idea. (meanwhile, across town, Cameron wakes up screaming.) Luke says they have to address Lucky's anger.
Haunted Star: Tracy continues to beg Ethan to stay away from Johnny.
Jason's Penthouse: Sam, Jason and Spinelli stand around plotting a jail break. But they are SO NICE ABOUT IT, y'all!
Courthouse: After much back and forth between Clair, The Atorrneys Corinthos, and Country Judge, Clair reminds Dante he is under oath and asks who shot him.
Commercials
Kelly's: Robin meets with Stephen. She says Sonny and Jason do awful things, but they also do wonderful things. Robin, no one has ever said anything other than that. But how are Lisa, Patrick and Stephen wrong that it ain't none of yours? She yammers about how she's seen Sonny at his most loving and protective side. Does she understand that if Michael had died when Patrick operated on him, he might have murdered her husband? Or how about how Dante is loving and generous and kind and has saved people's lives left and right, and Sonny was still willing to throw that all away?
Jake's: Patrick angrily throws darts. Lisa shows up to get drunk and let him complain about his wife with her. How about this, Robin? How about this conversation that you are letting happen right now? Is defending Jason and Sonny really more important than your own marriage? Has Patrick not been loving and kind? He has seen you at your actual worst, no? YOU THREW HIS BABY IN A FUCKING TREE, ROBIN, and Patrick not only forgave you, he nurtured you to health. What is the worst thing Sonny's seen you do? Tattle that Sonny and Jason kidnapped AJ"s son? Yet you're such an idiot you don't realize that it was YOU who could forgive THEM for doing that, not vice versa, like they poutingly demanded. It's wrong of Patrick to cheat, if that's what he does. But it's also wrong to choose the side of other men over your husband, over and over again, when that's based on some romanticized view of the past and a serious disrespect of the present. Sorry, just totally mad at Robin today. Lisa speaks in dulcet tones while Patrick drinks his beer, feeling like he comes second place to a hit man....who would kill him if it came to that, by the way. Again, it's wrong if he cheats, but it's even more wrong if he stays in a marriage with someone who feels that way about him. Also, go visit Liz! She's disappearing unless you can get Steve and Audrey to kiss!
Commercials
Jake's: Patrick mutters stuff about Robin, about how she'd keep something from him.. I missed what, but Lisa astutely says that must make him feel shut out. My guess is roughly 75% of marital affairs start out just like this.
Kelly's: Stephen says Patrick doesn't understand her loyalty to Sonny, and he thinks Patrick has a point. Robin repeats that same stupid point that patrick wasn't there and how nice he was to her. She doesn't want to be judged on her past. wtf? But she's ONLY judging Sonny based on his past. If she wants to just use the present: um: RIGHT NOW Sonny is on trial for murder, and he can't get bail b/c he shot a cop.
Stupid Break Out Set: Spinelli and Jason play Chloe and Jack, only without the even more improbable time travel across town.
Courthouse: In recess, Sonny goes to Dante and stands in front of him and holds out his hand. Like he's holding out a delicious ham. Like Dante is soooo lucky that Sonny is going to thank him. Dante stands and says Sonny isn't going to go to prison b/c Dante botched his arrest. "you're going to prison because you killed Claudia." Sonny nods that he knows and says thank you , son.
The judge says he's made his tedious decision.
Also, my phone rang, so I missed a few scenes.
the end
Jason's Penthouse: Sam, Jason and Spinelli stand around plotting a jail break. But they are SO NICE ABOUT IT, y'all!
Well as long as they are "NICE" about. Lets break him out already.
Thanks MAD
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Mad everytime you say this"She's disappearing unless you can get Steve and Audrey to kiss!" or this "That's because you have to make sure Steve and Audrey kiss at the Under the Sea Dance back in Victorian Port Charles, Lucky! Otherwise, Liz will never be born!" I giggle so hard my coworkers look at me like I am losing it I'll tell ya reading your recaps are betet than actually watching the show THANKS!!!
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I really need to punch Robin in her face...no seriously I really need to do it, just like when my neice starts screamin in the mall for something and whines BUT I NEEED IT
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Your recaps are better then the show. Thank you so much,
seriously, who the hell is that judge????
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Judge Jody,judge judy's twin separated @birth.
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He played the Headmaster on Gilmore Girls.
"We'd sit in the car and stay perfectly still in mannequin poses, so that people would think my mom was carting around mannequins. I know to you that does not sound fun, but it would crack us up at how preposterous it was. "
Mad~ Y'all weren't the only family playing that game, I used to play it w/ my sisters. LOL
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Jason and Sam stand around like they are playing "Mannequins" a game my brother and I played when we were like 4 and 7. We'd sit in the car and stay perfectly still in mannequin poses, so that people would think my mom was carting around mannequins. I know to you that does not sound fun, but it would crack us up at how preposterous it was. The game was really not to giggle at how silly the other one looked, pretending to be a mannequin. Anyway, Jason and Sam are playing that, or so it appears, while Spinelli am opewquwnfeaw 's the escape route for Sonny.
SOOOOOOOO Funny, best thing ever! I so would play that with my sisters. These are the best things about being kids, they " play" mannequin.love it
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Totally use to play mannequins! we'd play it in the front yard too, so people driving by would wonder...
Wow! Your anger for Robin is great! I hate that she keeps mentioning that Sonny must be a good guy since he donated money for the AIDS wing....money that came from illegal activities that someone may have lost their lives for. I wonder how Robin would feel about Sonny if her baby was kid-napped or hurt because of him/his line of work.
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